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Dumb Joke


Normski

Well Known and Active Website User
VOC Member
The wooden ball

An old man walks into the barbershop for a shave and haircut,

But he tells the barber he probably can't get all of his whiskers off because his cheeks are wrinkled from age.

The barber gets a little wooden ball from a cup on the shelf and tells him to put it inside his cheek to spread out the skin.

When he's finished, the old man tells the barber that was the
cleanest shave he's had in years.

But he wanted to know what would have happened If he had
swallowed that little ball.

The barber replied, "Just bring it back in a couple of days like
everyone else does."
 

chankly bore

Well Known and Active Website User
Non-VOC Member
A Catholic priest walks up to the desk clerk at a motel. "Good afternoon my son, I'm Father O'Brien, and you have a room reserved for me." He then leans close to the clerk and whispers "and I trust my porn channel is disabled." "You get regular porn like everyone else, you sick B@#$%^&", replies the clerk.
 

Little Honda

Well Known and Active Website User
VOC Member
The wooden ball

An old man walks into the barbershop for a shave and haircut,

But he tells the barber he probably can't get all of his whiskers off because his cheeks are wrinkled from age.

The barber gets a little wooden ball from a cup on the shelf and tells him to put it inside his cheek to spread out the skin.

When he's finished, the old man tells the barber that was the
cleanest shave he's had in years.

But he wanted to know what would have happened If he had
swallowed that little ball.

The barber replied, "Just bring it back in a couple of days like
everyone else does."
shit!
 

Cyborg

Well Known and Active Website User
VOC Member
That lady in the background looks remarkably like my mother. Ex army nurse.. same expression when she said: "you're not getting a motorcycle while you're living under this roof!" It takes some ingenuity to hide a motorcycle when you are 13.
 

Nulli Secundus

Well Known and Active Website User
VOC Member
VOC Forum Moderator
My Mum was probably the same and born a similar time to Her Majesty the Queen. My Dad, who was 17 years older than my Mum just gave me a motorcycle when I was 13 (125 BSA Bantam which I still have). I was riding his 1931 Python Sports Vincent at 13 too.
 

Cyborg

Well Known and Active Website User
VOC Member
Mine was a 125 Harley Hummer, so a mirror image of the Bantam.
#doppelganger

They eventually came to the conclusion that it was a losing battle and a motorcycle might distract me from aggravating the local constabulary. The "Hummer" morphed into an Inter which I still have (or more accurately now have again)
 

highbury731

Well Known and Active Website User
VOC Member
My parents went abroad and I promptly went out and bought a motorbike. Fait accompli.....

FWIW When Harry and William were younger they liked to go out on modern Triumph sportsbikes. They were anonymous and could just go out and have fun. It must have been an interesting job being their Police minders.
 

Sakura

Well Known and Active Website User
VOC Member
What? You mean there's another way? No one told me.
2 engineering students, 1 pushing a bike. Eng student 2 to Eng student 1. "where did you get the bike?" 1 says" you will never believe this. This beautiful girl biked up to me, took off all her clothes, laid down on the ground and said "take whatever you like" so I took the bike" 2 says "good choice, the clothes probably wouldn't have fitted you"
 

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